tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-114109092024-03-20T11:12:24.938-04:00I Hate This Collar BellI'm a grey and rotund male cat, wrongly imprisoned in Tallahassee, FloridaPaticushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04412270073568754882noreply@blogger.comBlogger68125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11410909.post-84605104645988207482012-01-19T11:11:00.003-05:002012-01-19T11:23:26.638-05:00Is This Thing On?<div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div>Can you hear me?<div><br /></div><div> Damn!! It's been nearly 3 years since I typed some shit out on this blog! 3 years!!??!!? Can that be? I guess it can, because it seems that it is., or something like that.</div><div><br /></div><div> You would think 3 years would give me an awful lot to write about...Um...Yeah, about that. I'm pretty much still the same fly cat you always knew, yo!</div><div><br /></div><div> I hang. I eat. I poop. I puke. I meow. You know,</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div> all the fly shit that cats do, I do too.</div><div><br /></div><div> What I have NOT been doing is sharing my shit with you, and that needs to S.T.O.P. right about now.</div><div><br /></div><div> I am BACK babies, and better than ever.</div><div></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div> Here's a pic of me freaking out the Fat, Bearded, Idiot.</div><div><br /></div><div><div><img src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgunKV5lFYolETFJG3S9qUR7EtSyuAYQQMmhvZMrHM_7gOdIMVTR004jT3AegVSPM49NTlM9nPVHQ67kfk7tSz9tI44GwiCI_NeRPAaEtDyYky-wBzHEEHl_W8PgUpzHLgWmR84ug/s400/IMAG0086.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5699379272019730546" style="display: block; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: auto; margin-bottom: 10px; margin-left: auto; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 239px; " /></div></div><div><br /></div><div> peace out, homies...And I promise to stay in touch!!</div>Fenwickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02731743718474672357noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11410909.post-50304465044442873552009-06-04T12:06:00.002-04:002009-06-04T12:23:24.487-04:00I'm A Cat, Get Me Outta Here!!!How's THAT for a pop culture reference, huh ? Pretty damn sweet.<div><br /></div><div>Just thought I'd drop a line, let you folks know just what the F-U-C-K is goin' on in the World O Fenwick... In a word...Not a fucking thing! Same old shit.</div><div> Wake up.</div><div> Badger the Fat,Bearded Idiot to FEED ME!!!!!!!</div><div> Eat.</div><div> Poop.</div><div> Nap.</div><div> Repeat portions of routine as necessary.</div><div><br /></div><div> But I have been thinking about switching things up lately. Maybe get back into my pottery. I gots the free time, right ? Why not crank out some vases and shit ?</div><div><br /></div><div> Or maybe I'll go in a new direction....Papier Mache...That would be sweet. I have been thinking a lot about tennis lately, maybe some Papier Mache sculptures of some of the greats of tennis? I like where I'm going with this.</div><div><br /></div><div> Excuse me, I got some newspaper to rip up.</div><div><br /></div>Fenwickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02731743718474672357noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11410909.post-86628293518773075662009-04-27T09:58:00.002-04:002009-04-27T10:42:31.102-04:00'sup, Y'all ?Wow, it has been awhile, hasn't it ? Makes me think of that Staind song...They were a happy bunch, weren't they ?<div> How you beyotches doing ? I'm five by five, you know ? Same ole, same ole.</div><div><br /></div><div> You know what, that's not really true. I gots me a problem.</div><div><br /></div><div> There is another fucking cat hanging around my yard. Can you BELIEVE that shit ? Who does that little bitch think she is ? She's just lucky that I am not an outdoor cat, or she would be hating life right about now.</div><div><br /></div><div> I'm at a loss here. You know what she did yesterday ? I found her sitting right outside the back door ! What the hell is that, huh ? That is a blatant disrespect of my space,and she is soooo lucky that I can't get out of this house.</div><div><br /></div><div> I bet she's wandering around out there right now...Peeing on stuff in MY YARD!! I know I can't get out there, but still...That's my stuff! No one should pee on those bushes, but me!!</div><div><br /></div><div> I am terribly vexed !!!</div>Fenwickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02731743718474672357noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11410909.post-1937492184127550452008-12-05T10:35:00.001-05:002008-12-05T10:35:46.013-05:00I Didn't Even Get A SNIFF of That Motherfucking Turkey!!!!Can you BELIEVE that shit ?<br /><br /> Not a scrap, not a lick.<br /><br />What the fuck, man ?<br /><br />I am speechless. Flabbergasted. Can one be "flabbergasted" ? I think one can, because this one certainly is.<br /><br />I'm definitely peeing on something now.Fenwickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02731743718474672357noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11410909.post-75170361652525639972008-09-30T00:00:00.000-04:002008-09-30T00:00:00.779-04:00Oh, The Indignity....I realized that I never made good on my promise of pictures of "the shaving" aftermath.<br /> well, here's one. I stole it off the Nice Lady's computer.<br /> This picture is of me when I couldn't really use my back legs...I guess she found that pretty funny, so she snapped a picture of it. Hilarious!! I'll show her...I will have my revenge...You mark my words...<br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXfJ9RxXvo5pPWxU7salJrovwcb7ndKHd2AZzQ4f3BZKKWQxQeShSbz5MsB8M0Ee7V6eBqIClH9jdcMacdMZk0o6RyZBxBMY9NZ8Kq1n3Z_M0onmX6UazEImwII10IdcIykqy02g/s1600-h/fenwickshaved.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXfJ9RxXvo5pPWxU7salJrovwcb7ndKHd2AZzQ4f3BZKKWQxQeShSbz5MsB8M0Ee7V6eBqIClH9jdcMacdMZk0o6RyZBxBMY9NZ8Kq1n3Z_M0onmX6UazEImwII10IdcIykqy02g/s400/fenwickshaved.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5251490668560327842" border="0" /></a>Paticushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04412270073568754882noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11410909.post-33233255208829800692008-09-29T12:43:00.003-04:002008-09-29T13:02:04.000-04:00I Think It's Happening Again...The apartment is starting to fill up with empty boxes.<br /> And I think that probably means we are moving again.<br /> At least I hope it's "we". You never know. I've heard those horror stories of people leaving their beloved pets behind...And I certainly would not put it past that Fat Bearded Idiot to leave me here. And if they do leave me here, you can bet your ass I ain't valiantly trekking across the country to find them. No damn way! I'll find someone else here to take care of me. I can be damn cute and furry if I need to be.<br /> I don't know for sure that we are moving, and if we are, I don't know where to. they did move a couple of boxes the other day, so it could be like that one move in L.A. ,where we just moved across town.<br /> Man, I hope that's it. I do NOT want top deal with another days long trek across this fine country of ours. i just don't think I could take it. Locked in a car with that Fat,Bearded, Idiot singing off-key to anything and everything on the radio. Criminy.<br /> Shit, now all this thinking and worrying has made me tired. Ima have me a nap. I'll do some digging later and get back to you.Paticushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04412270073568754882noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11410909.post-50490654458017019722008-07-31T09:34:00.002-04:002008-07-31T10:13:32.388-04:00Un-Fucking-Believable!WAIT until you here this bullshit that's going on with me now.<br /><br /> Not to be indelicate, but I was having a bit of an "issue" with my bodily functions...How should I put this...I was pooping pudding ? Does that work for you ? No ? A little too graphic, well it's out there now, so let's just move on, shall we ?<br /> Anyhoo, I was having some diarrhea, and Tuesday night, I kinda decided to shit on the living room carpet. I'm not sure why I did this, maybe I thought it would be funny ? I really don't know. BUT, the Fat,Bearded Idiot apparently HEARD me do this(I heard him say that is sounded like I was trying to get ketchup out of an almost empty squeeze bottle), and came out, chased me around the living room, and locked me in the god-damned KITCHEN!! Can you imagine that ? ME, the F to the E to the N to the W to the I to the C to the K, locked in the mother fucking KITCHEN!?!?!? Well, that shit happened.<br /><br /> So, I decided that i would show him, and I took a few more shits on the floor of the kitchen.<br /><br /> Bad move on my part. This, apparently, made them both CONCERNED about me, and the Nice Lady did the unthinkable- SHE CALLED THE VET!!!!<br /><br /> Then, I was stuffed in a box, and dropped off at that sadists' office. They poked at me, so I hissed at them, so they doped me up. I don't remember much after that.<br /><br /> But get this, I woke up, and they had SHAVED me !!!! Can you believe that shit ? I still have my "mane" as they call it, and they left my tail and my legs- but I feel so NAKED !!<br /><br /> But guess what ? That's not the worst of it. Right now, I cannot stand up. My motherfucking back legs are not working at all.Well, that's not true. i can move them, I just can't stand up on them. It's weird.<br /><br /> I have been listening to the conversations, and this is what I have pieced together. I have bad hairballs(no, not hairy balls, wiseassses- hairballs-in my stomach), and they have caused gastritis. So, they shaved me top prevent the hairballs. I have to take all this medication, and my legs are screwy because of the sedation. I should have my legs back by the end of the day.<br /><br />Can you say shitty week ?<br /><br /> DAMN !!!!!<br /><br />P.S.- I'll have pictures later.Fenwickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02731743718474672357noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11410909.post-62945498090606537092008-06-18T09:56:00.003-04:002008-06-18T10:22:56.834-04:00Ribbons !!! Ribbons !!!!<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxH70wDrhwjFQaadEeGR-23KJQFbLuEO8jNzv7Vg5cVH8ZDdAqOiqPEtLa3yR5kkDU8lOrzgRzR5SepGcgNVyxXqZxSTE8NsY0msfs0ObP-_aC88NFqwt5N_E6H-4hBlbAjEyRuQ/s1600-h/ribbons-lg.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxH70wDrhwjFQaadEeGR-23KJQFbLuEO8jNzv7Vg5cVH8ZDdAqOiqPEtLa3yR5kkDU8lOrzgRzR5SepGcgNVyxXqZxSTE8NsY0msfs0ObP-_aC88NFqwt5N_E6H-4hBlbAjEyRuQ/s400/ribbons-lg.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5213221499378033842" border="0" /></a>Have i ever told you that I LOVE ribbons ? well, i fucking DO !! I fucking ADORE ribbons !!! I like chasing them around, wrestling with them.<br /> But you want to know what I like best ?<br /> Eating them !!<br /> I do !!<br /> I fucking LOVE devouring the fucking things !!<br /> So I was in HEAVEN on Saturday when the Fat Bearded Idiot, the Nice lady and the Things came back from food shopping with...BALLOONS !!!!<br /> You know what balloons have tied to them don't you ?(Well, the very BEST balloons do anyway) that's right- RIBBONS !!!! Glorious pink ribbons.<br /> It took all my willpower to not rush them when they entered the house. But I needed to be calm. To bide my time. the ribbons would be mine...All mine.<br /> I kept a close eye on them while the Things bounced all over the house with the...But then, it was dinner time, and they all sat at the table. The balloons were left in the middle of the room. This was my chance. i slunk over to them, and I started to nibble. Precious ribbon.<br /> Then, I heard a scream! the Nice Lady saw me !! Then the Fat, Bearded Idiot flew across the room and swatted me on my precious heiney !! I bolted, taking the balloon with me, but he followed, and wrestled the balloon(and the precious ribbon) away from me.<br /> I knew I had missed my chance. I heard the Nice Lady going on about how the ribbons make me sick and blah blah puking on the carpet blah blah blah.<br /> And now, the balloons and the precious ribbon are hidden from me. Sure, I get the occasional nibble here and there, but it's just a tease.<br /> I guess I'll just have to wait until the next gift season.Paticushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04412270073568754882noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11410909.post-3521552476597319552008-05-05T12:57:00.002-04:002008-05-05T12:58:37.302-04:00FoodWould it kill that Fat, Bearded Idiot to make me a waffle <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">every</span> once in awhile ?<br /><br /> I really like me some waffles.Paticushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04412270073568754882noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11410909.post-59556658716438476262008-04-15T15:45:00.001-04:002008-04-15T15:47:13.013-04:00I Didn't Think They Could....But Burger King managed to make that fucking Burger King even CREEPIER.<br /><br /> have you seen the new commercials ?<br /> He's a futuristic robot now.<br /><br /> (shudder)Fenwickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02731743718474672357noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11410909.post-2280259501218767412008-03-25T08:58:00.002-04:002008-03-25T09:04:33.223-04:00March Freaking Madness !!!God-Damned <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">Bracketology</span> !!<br /><br /> You know, before this Tournament started, I thought I had a PHD in <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">Bracketology</span>...Shit, I ain't even cracked a textbook, apparently.<br /><br /> Who the fuck is Davidson, for the love of Mike ? And what is up with my man O.J. Mayo and <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">USC</span> ? First round and done ? Are you fucking kidding me ?My brackets are all shot to hell.<br /><br /> And where, exactly, am I supposed to come up with eleven thousand dollars ?<br /><br />I'm a cat, for God's sake. Who the fuck even let's a cat bet eleven thousand dollars ?<br /><br />That Fat, Bearded Idiot is NOT going to be happy with me.Paticushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04412270073568754882noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11410909.post-51720385437145910482008-03-04T13:42:00.002-05:002008-03-04T14:52:22.772-05:00It's Raining Today...The rain always makes me sad...Oh wait, no, it's the fact that my BALLS were removed 13 years ago...THAT'S what always makes me sad. Rain doesn't really affect me at all. I don't go out anyway, so what does rain do to me ?<br /> I do wish I could turn on the stereo, though. I would dig some Sam Cooke right now. you know, a little "Bring It on Home To Me", or "A Change Is Gonna Come " ? That would be <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">sweeet</span>. That's right, I spelled <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">sweeet</span> with THREE "E's" !! Try and stop me, bitches !!!<br /> Or how about "Wonderful World" ? "don't know much about history..." Alas, it is not to be, as I cannot reach the stereo to crank up the tunes. And that Fat,Bearded Idiot won't buy me a damned <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">iPod</span>, so what the fuck is a cat supposed to do, huh ?<br /> I'm gonna go pee in something valuable.Paticushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04412270073568754882noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11410909.post-68924015347406875962008-02-14T13:13:00.003-05:002008-02-14T13:23:11.054-05:00Something's Definitely Up Now...They have started feeding me Fancy Feast...I don't trust it. That Fat,Bearded Idiot is up to something.<br /><br />I mean, I like the Fancy Feast, and it sure tatse betterthan that hot ass IAMS they were feeding me...But the IAMS was in an AUTOFEEDER !!! I could eat whenever I wanted !!! Sure, it tasted like Hot Ass, but I could eat it all the fucking time !!!<br /><br />Now, I am at that fucker's mercy ! I think they are trying to get me to lose weight. That sadist in the white coat they sent me to, I think he's involved too. I overheard hiim saying something to the Fat,Bearded Idiot about obesity but with "good musculature"...I think he meant me. If he had not mentioned the good musculature, I might have guessed he was talking about the Fat, bearded Idiot, but there at no musculature in that Jabba The hut clone. No fucking way, man.<br /><br />For now, I'll enjoy the Fancy Feast when I can get it, but I am not taking my eyes off of them for a second!!Paticushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04412270073568754882noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11410909.post-67357501632366442882008-01-22T12:42:00.000-05:002008-01-22T11:42:22.554-05:00Where's That Damned "Open Window" I Have Heard So Much About ?Isn't that what they say ? "God never closes a door without opening a window." ? Well, I see the god-damned closed door, but I ain't seen no open window !<br /><br /><br />That's right, They closed the door. You know which door...The door to the god-damned bedroom !! Aargh !!! That fat, hairy son of a bitch !!!<br /><br /><br /><br />Now I have to sleep in the living room like some kind of dog or something. How humiliating ! I think it might be because of that time I was going to kill him. That Fat, Bearded Idiot has been different towards me ever since. I don't like it...It makes me uneasy. Just look at what happened to that skinny little bastard Arlo. Exiled. So they say. How do I know they didn't feed him to me ? I wouldn't put it past that Fat, Bearded Idiot.<br /><br />You know what i would really like right now ?<br /><br />To sleep on the god-damned bed !! Haven't you been paying attention ? Try and keep up, will you ? What am I, meowing to myself ?<br /><br />The good news is, that fat,Bearded Idiot watched the Bourne Ultimatum over the weekend, and I took notes. I'll have him killed before the month is over. mark my words.Paticushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04412270073568754882noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11410909.post-57131886880641394082007-07-02T11:29:00.000-04:002007-07-02T11:32:34.135-04:00I Almost Had Him...I was almost free.<br /><br /> This morning, I climbed up on the bed, and I was just about positioned to smother that Fat, Bearded Idiot, when he rolled over !! I quickly laid down on the ladies pillow, but she knocked me onto the floor.<br /> I had to regroup, and by the time I was ready again, they were both awake !! I felt like Snidely Whiplash-"Curses! Foiled again!!"<br /><br /> Son-of-a-BITCH !!!!!Paticushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04412270073568754882noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11410909.post-70049197819534115962007-06-29T10:19:00.000-04:002007-06-29T11:40:24.815-04:00The Master PlanOne of these days it will work.<br /><br />What will work, you ask ?<br /><br />My plan to trip and kill that Fat, Bearded,Idiot. I realize now that I missed my greatest opportunity. Autumn of 2005- that was the time. the apartment was in disarray. He was not sleeping more than a few hours at a time. that was my best chance. I should have used those "things'" arrival to my advantage, but I didn't. I dropped the ball, so to speak. And I am tortured by my lack of action. I was thrown off of my game by those screeching creatures.<br /><br /> But my time will come again...I will have my victory.<br /><br /> Strangely enough, the exit of my greatest ally may help me succeed in the end. Ever since Arlo split, they have been leaving the bedroom door open at night. I might be able to suffocate that bastard in his sleep. They also have stopped leaving on a light in the living room, so if I can get him to wander out in the middle of the night, I could slip underneath his feet, and WHAM !!! Down he'd go, like a sack of potatoes. Now, I just need to formulate my contingency plan in the event that the fall doesn't kill him.<br /><br /> But I will have my day, my friends, just you wait and see.Paticushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04412270073568754882noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11410909.post-67005316911024912102007-06-22T09:56:00.000-04:002007-06-29T10:19:33.931-04:00Summertiiiime....And the licking is easy...<br /><br />That's right, it is now <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">officially</span> summertime. Though it has been <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">ballsac</span> melting hot and humid here since, oh I don't know, the BEGINNING OF TIME ?!?!?!?!?<br /><br />Cheese and rice, why did we move to this damn place ? Like it's not bad enough that I'm big boned AND hairy, now we had to move to <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">Satan's</span> <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">ballsac</span>.<br /><br />I am actually less inspired to move than <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">usual</span>, and even I didn't think that was possible.<br /><br />This is one of the few times I can appreciate that Fat, Bearded Idiot, that son of a bitch knows how to crank some air conditioning.<br /><br />Speaking of the song "Summertime", I can never decide whether I like the Sam Cooke version or the Janis Joplin version better. Can I like them equally ? I suppose I can.Paticushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04412270073568754882noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11410909.post-74237042079799072372007-06-19T13:23:00.000-04:002007-06-19T13:23:24.256-04:00What the Fuck Is He DOING Here ?That Fat, Bearded Idiot is HOME today.<br /><br /> Why ? This place is supposed to be MINE from 7:15 a.m. until sometime around 4 p.m., Monday through Friday. that fat fuck is supposed to be gone, the nice lady is supposed to be gone, and they take those 2 creatures with them !!<br /><br /> They all left this morning, just like they're supposed to. THEN, he came BACK! I was just getting ready to get down to some bidness, and I hear the key in the lock. what the fuck ? I had to lay down in the middle of the floor and pretend to be asleep.<br /><br /> I figured that he had forgotten something, but no, he stayed here until damn near 2 motherfuckin' 45 !!<br /><br /> Ruined damn near my whole day !!<br /><br /> Laying his fat, lazy ass on MY couch. watching some damn movie about a fucking invisible six foot rabbit.<br /><br /> I didn't get any of my shit done. I didn't continue my work on the leg of the couch. I didn't get to chase any imaginary shit around the house. I am waaay fucking behind now. I'm gonna sleep at the foot of the bed tonight and trip him, that stupid Fat Bearded Idiot. teach him to ruin my fucking day.Paticushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04412270073568754882noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11410909.post-49441153841505538702007-05-03T13:34:00.001-04:002007-05-03T13:34:56.504-04:00I....loves me some J. Geils Band !!!<br /><br /> Love stinks...Yeah, yeah !!!Paticushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04412270073568754882noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11410909.post-40430403617107030512007-03-20T11:49:00.000-04:002007-03-20T11:53:57.494-04:00Damn Straight....Your results:<br /><strong>You are</strong> <strong><span style="font-size:180%;">Venom<br /></span></strong><table><tbody><tr><td><table><tbody><tr><td>Venom</td><td><hr align="left" width="100" size="4"></td><td>100%</td></tr><tr><td>Apocalypse</td><td><hr align="left" width="100" size="4"></td><td>100%</td><img src="http://www.thesuperheroquiz.com/villain/pics/venom.jpg" /></tr><tr><td>Poison Ivy</td><td><hr align="left" width="100" size="4"></td><td>100%</td></tr><tr><td>Dark Phoenix</td><td><hr align="left" width="99" size="4"></td><td>99%</td></tr><tr><td>Magneto</td><td><hr align="left" width="88" size="4"></td><td>88%</td></tr><tr><td>Mystique</td><td><hr align="left" width="84" size="4"></td><td>84%</td></tr><tr><td>Catwoman</td><td><hr align="left" width="77" size="4"></td><td>77%</td></tr><tr><td>The Joker</td><td><hr align="left" width="70" size="4"></td><td>70%</td></tr><tr><td>Dr. Doom</td><td><hr align="left" width="70" size="4"></td><td>70%</td></tr><tr><td>Juggernaut</td><td><hr align="left" width="68" size="4"></td><td>68%</td></tr><tr><td>Two-Face</td><td><hr align="left" width="68" size="4"></td><td>68%</td></tr><tr><td>Lex Luthor</td><td><hr align="left" width="60" size="4"></td><td>60%</td></tr><tr><td>Mr. Freeze</td><td><hr align="left" width="56" size="4"></td><td>56%</td></tr><tr><td>Kingpin</td><td><hr align="left" width="54" size="4"></td><td>54%</td></tr><tr><td>Green Goblin</td><td><hr align="left" width="52" size="4"></td><td>52%</td></tr><tr><td>Riddler</td><td><hr align="left" width="42" size="4"></td><td>42%</td></tr></tbody></table></td><td width="250">Strength, disguise and adrenaline are your greatest weapons.<br /><br /></td></tr></tbody></table><a href="http://www.thesuperheroquiz.com/villain"><br />Click here to take the "Which Super Villain am I?" quiz...</a>Paticushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04412270073568754882noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11410909.post-81641587381014230602007-03-05T10:02:00.000-05:002007-03-05T16:19:40.382-05:00Privacy or Unfair Imposition ?So, that Nice Lady put the cover back on the litter box yesterday. I gotta be honest with you, I am not sure how I feel about this.<br /> On the one paw, I certainly appreciate the privacy. <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">Not</span> the same as a door with a lock on it, but it's better than squatting out in the wide open, that's for sure.<br /> But, on the other paw, the claustrophobia!! Jesus, it is not a big space in there- and the smell ain't no picnic either.Plus, I have always been a bit of an edge hanger, and the cover definitely takes that out of the repertoire. Sure, I can stick my head out the door a bit, but it's not the same as lining all four paws up on the rim of the <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">litterbox</span>, and dropping the kittens off at the beach, if you know what I mean.<br /> So as you can see, I am certainly torn. I do not know wha<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">t</span> to do. I think I will hold off a day or two before I shit on the floor again.Paticushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04412270073568754882noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11410909.post-3915231927115609212007-02-21T08:48:00.000-05:002007-02-21T08:55:21.684-05:00'Sup ?So, it has been a little while. What the fuck do you want from me ? I got napping to do.<br /><br /> Not much to report, really. I just got a new water dish. It's stainless steel, and I think it's pretty damn fresh.<br /><br /> You what I love ? Having my own damn <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">litter box</span>. Ever since that <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">gangly</span> orange bastard left, I have had my own toilet, and man, is that sweet.<br /><br /> What else to tell you ? oh, get this...So the "things" are all walking now , and the Fat, Bearded Idiot and the Nice Lady have "expanded" their pen, so now there is a fence at the entrance to the kitchen. Hello ? My food and water are in there ! My <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">litter box</span> is in the <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">laundry room</span> off the kitchen. I can't climb over a damned fence. And sometimes they leave in the morning, and the FORGET to open the gate. I'm separated from everything I love. <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">WTF</span>?<br /><br /> I'm pissed now,I'm gonna go pee in a shoe.<br /><br /> I'm out.Paticushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04412270073568754882noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11410909.post-1168963773197500922007-01-16T11:07:00.000-05:002007-01-18T08:38:12.510-05:00"The Descent" Is Fucking Creeeeeepy !!<span style="font-size:180%;">SPOILER ALERT-</span> Plot points to the spelunking horror movie "The Descent" will be revealed below-You have been warned.<br /><br /><br />Allow me to set the scene: Saturday night, approximately 8:00 p.m., living room of MY apartment. Fat, Bearded Idiot and Nice Lady on the couch, THINGS nestled in their cages. Yours truly, splayed on the floor, stealthily watching the television(they are not aware that I actually watch it) which has a rerun of Scrubs on(I love that TiVO), a perfectly peaceful Saturday night...Until...They put on a fucking movie a fucking craaaaazy, spooky, creeepy fucking movie. "The Descent". Have you seen this thing ? Jesus to tha Christ, it scared the shit outta me.<br /> Why the fuck would anyone want to go spelunking, anyway ?<br /><br /> This shit was crazy. They go into some cave that ain't on no map, they get attacked by creepy cave dwelling creatures, they get all eaten and shit It's madness, man. Why would anyone watch this thing on purpose ? That Fat Bearded Idiot has a screw or two loose, my friend. Just like the main character in the movie. Did you see it ? Maybe you can answer this question- Do you think that maybe there were no cave creatures ? That she went crazy and killed everyone ? She certainly was crazy at the end of it. And I got to thinking, what if the attacks by the cave people didn't make her crazy, what if she went crazy, and then she attacked her friends ? Think about it.<br /> Did I just blow your mind a little bit ?Paticushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04412270073568754882noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11410909.post-1167766220884932432007-01-02T13:50:00.000-05:002007-01-02T14:30:20.976-05:00Happy New Year....Barely.<br /> I just spent 10 days in that hellhole they call the "vet's office". That's right, the Fat, Bearded Idiot, the Nice lady, and those 2 Things locked me up for ten god-damned days !! I didn't get a trial or anything! She just up and throws me in the cage and it's off to the vet.<br /><br /> I think they all went somewhere, as just before my "removal" I saw piles of clothes and luggage about. I should have seen it coming, and tried to hide, but I didn't. Damn catnip, as that old ad said,"It will do NOTHING to you, too."<br /><br /> Back to my time in the "hole". I tell you, it was the first time I really missed my old pal Arlo. He was always such a pain in the ass to the guards. I just don't have the guts for it. I just fall in line, like some sort of pussy- Hah! "Some sort of pussy"...I crack myself up.<br /><br /> Anyways, I caught a fucking cold while I was there !! How's that for a fucking Hannukah present ? Thank you very much.<br /><br /> Now I can't stop fucking sneezing, AND I'm being given this fucking medicine that tastes like cat barf(and not the GOOD kind of cat barf), but they put it on WET food. I have not had wet food in God knows how long. Damn my lack of willpower!! But at least it only taints the taste of about half the serving, so that's not so bad.<br /><br /> Well, they finally picked me up last Saturday. I must say, I missed those people. Even the 2 Things. I have decided to let them come a little bit closer to me, and I have even let them touch me a few times. As long as they don't move too fast, it doesn't seem so bad. I guess we'll wait and see.<br /> A Happy New Year to Y'all.<br /><br />FenwickPaticushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04412270073568754882noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11410909.post-1166033961490816132006-12-13T13:06:00.000-05:002006-12-13T13:19:21.526-05:00Superman ReturnsThe Fat, Bearded Idiot watched this over the weekend, so I watched it too. It seemed kinda like a remake of the first two Superman movies(with no hint of Superman III- Hello ? It was only the best of the bunch. Richard Pryor ? Fugheddaboutit.) but also kind of not. But it did seem like the main actor guy was doing an impression of Christopher Reeve as Clark Kent. And to whomever it was that played Jimmy Olson(I have no time to watch credits, and you can shove your IMDB up yer ass, thank you.), all I have to say to you is...You are NO Marc McClure. And speaking of Superman:The Movie(1978), I had no idea that the story was written by Mario Puzo(of Godfather fame) and he also cowrote the screeenplay.<br /><br /> But theat is neither here nor there. What i wanted to write about was, perhaps one of the greatest moments in cinema history(right up there with Rambo shooting the dog in "First Blood") is in Superman Returns, when Lex Luthor returns to the old lady's house and they see one of the Pomeranian dogs that the old lady had, and they say "Weren't there two of those ?" and then they cut back to the dog, and he's surrounded by fur and bones- He had eaten the other fuckin' dog !!!<br /> Priceless.Paticushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04412270073568754882noreply@blogger.com0