I'm A Cat, Get Me Outta Here!!!

How's THAT for a pop culture reference, huh ? Pretty damn sweet.

Just thought I'd drop a line, let you folks know just what the F-U-C-K is goin' on in the World O Fenwick... In a word...Not a fucking thing! Same old shit.

  Wake up.

   Badger the Fat,Bearded Idiot to FEED ME!!!!!!!

   Eat.

   Poop.

   Nap.

   Repeat portions of routine as necessary.

  But I have been thinking about switching things up lately. Maybe get back into my pottery. I gots the free time, right ? Why not crank out some vases and shit ?

  Or maybe I'll go in a new direction....Papier Mache...That would be sweet. I have been thinking a lot about tennis lately, maybe some Papier Mache sculptures of some of the greats of tennis? I like where I'm going with this.

 Excuse me, I got some newspaper to rip up.

'sup, Y'all ?

Wow, it has been awhile, hasn't it ? Makes me think of that Staind song...They were a happy bunch, weren't they ?

 How you beyotches doing ? I'm five by five, you know ? Same ole, same ole.

  You know what, that's not really true. I gots me a problem.

  There is another fucking cat hanging around my yard. Can you BELIEVE that shit ? Who does that little bitch think she is ? She's just lucky that I am not an outdoor cat, or she would be hating life right about now.

  I'm at a loss here. You know what she did yesterday ? I found her sitting right outside the back door ! What the hell is that, huh ? That is a blatant disrespect of my space,and she is soooo lucky that I can't get out of this house.

 I bet she's wandering around out there right now...Peeing on stuff in MY YARD!! I know I can't get out there, but still...That's my stuff! No one should pee on those bushes, but me!!

 I am terribly vexed !!!